Filmed mostly by my best friend, Jess. I’ve been asked when will people get to see this. I wasn’t going to put it up because it’s quite dark at some points but what the heck.
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I get really depressed when I hit send and receive and end up with 30 or 40 new e-mails coming into my inbox. How about you? Are you looking for a way to better manage your e-mail? Would you like to feel more in control, rather than having your e-mail control you? That’s why I have put together my new book called “The E-mail Manual“. It is the book you should have received when you first started using e-mail. I think if everybody had a copy of this book on their desks and read it before they started using e-mail, there would be a fewer problems and issues with using and managing e-mail. Please enjoy these 5 email strategies. Be on the lookout for my other articles on how to better manage your e-mail and reduce the size of your inbox.
21. Colour code important emails as they come In.
One terrific function that can help you pick out Emails that are important is having Outlook colour code your Emails as they come into your Inbox.
For example, you can create a colour rule so that Outlook will colour an email from a certain person, company or group.
By using colour coding, certain Emails will stand out from the rest which is tremendously useful, particularly if you get a lot of Email.
Setting up a message rule to colour code your Emails is just as easy as setting up a rule for moving Emails to certain folders. Just go through the same steps we described above but when you come to the action you want Outlook to take, check âHighlight It with Colourâ.
Then in the box where the rule is being created, you will see the word âcolourâ there which is also a hyperlink. Click on âcolourâ and you can pick the colour you want that email to become in your Inbox.
22. Do not let outlook automatically add people to your address book
There is a setting in Outlook where anyone who sends you an email automatically goes into your address book.
This is a good way to end up with thousands of addresses in your address book, many of which over time become essentially useless to you.
Turn OFF that feature in the Options area.
23. Always do a speel and grammer check
Just like in Microsoft Word, you should get Outlook (or your preferred email software) to check your spelling either as you are writing your email or just before you hit send. Itâs a good idea to turn on spell check and leave it on whenever you are writing Emails directly within Outlook.
The steps for turning spell check on are simple. Go to the âoptionsâ menu in Outlook for details.
24. Set up message rules so outlook keeps things organised for you
Outlook allows you to create ârulesâ so you can have any email moved automatically to any folder you like. A rule can be set up based on who sent it, the subject line or almost any other criteria you choose.
This is a great way to keep your Inbox empty of things like newsletters or email you know that are not important to read this week, but you do need to file away (for later).
Just let Outlook send every email that you don’t need to read (and has come into your Inbox), into its proper folder. You can look at them by category or based on what you want to see, not simply by what arrives in your Inbox.
25. Set a time at the end of the day to do email maintenance
With so many people sending and receiving hundreds of Emails each week, taking time to manage your own email should become a part of your working week as much as brushing your teeth is part of your âgetting-ready-in-the-morningâ ritual.
So set aside a certain time towards the end of your week to do your email maintenance. This includes reading new Emails that you haven’t had a chance to review or respond to earlier in the week.
Managing your email also means cleaning out your Inbox by deleting Emails you donât need, creating address book entries for contacts you will need again, updating your message rules, and making sure there are no important messages or tasks that have been overlooked, misplaced or misfiled.
It’s also a good idea to check your calendar (for appointments due tomorrow) as well as your task list for things to do today and tomorrow.
If you would like to learn how to better manage your e-mail or inbox, why not consider my Zero Inbox training program? This e-mail management course is available in Australia and will soon be available online. You can visit, http://www.success.net.au/seminars/zero-inbox.html to learn more about how to better manage your e-mail and reduce your inbox. Alternatively, you can visit: http://www.zero-inbox.com/
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Cognitive Distortions
      What is the difference between Mrs. Aâs response according to first and second combination of cognitive perceptions of self-attribution? Why did in the first combination of cognitive perceptions of self-attribution, Mrs. A attributed and compounded all blame to herself (internal)? But why in the second combination of cognitive perceptions of self-attribution, Mrs. A attributed it to Ms. B and Mr. A (external)? The answer lies in what is called âcognitive distortionsâ (Beck, 1967). What are cognitive distortions? And what are the types of cognitive distortions found in depressed persons?
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           Errors in reasoning.
           Cognitive distortions are basically âerrors in reasoningâ (Beck, 1967). Were there errors in reasoning in the first combination of cognitive perceptions of self-attribution? The answer is an emphatic, yes! In fact, there were several errors in reasoning in the first combination of cognitive perceptions of self-attribution. Firstly, Mrs. Aâs self blame was erroneous, as the blame should be on Mr. A and Ms. B. Secondly, Mrs. Aâs subjective view of her physical and sexual deficits were erroneous, as the physical and sexual deficit could be alterable (unstable), untrue or unjustifiable. There could many other reasons why Mr. A was attracted to having an affair with Ms. B. Thirdly, basing on the erroneous view of her physical and sexual deficits, to attribute Mr. Aâs infidelity as naturally predictable (uncontrollable) is erroneous. The third reasoning is erroneous because it based on the second reasoning which is erroneous. The third reasoning is also erroneous because Mr. A is individually, cognitively, morally and lawfully responsible for his decisions and actions. Are there other forms of cognitive distortions? Yes, there are, as will be discussed in the types of cognitive distortions.
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           Types of cognitive distortions.
           Sharf (2000) gives a list of other forms of cognitive distortions that depressed persons may experience and display. Here are descriptive examples of them.
1. Dichotomous thinking
Example: Â My husband must love me a hundred percent, or else he doesnât love me.
Problem: Thinking in absolutes, black or white and with no provision for grey areas in life. Every thing is either positive or negative, which is totally unrealistic perspective of life.
Solution: The promotion of thinking in a synthesis form that includes black, white and grey, would assist the person with realistic thinking. For in life not everything is in absolutes.
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2. Selective abstractions
Example: My boyfriend failed me this year, because out of fifteen years of celebrating my birthday grandly, he forgot to get my favorite wine brand in this year.
Problem: A person with this distortion would extract one item, fact, event and behavior from a group of items, facts, events or behaviors to amplify and use it to initiate, create precedence or justify their decision or action.
Solution: Promotion of thinking telescopically (big picture) before micro-scoping (details) in the examination of facts, events or behaviors, would paint a more holistic picture in life.
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3. Arbitrary inferences involve two types of erroneous thinking, namely, âmind readingâ and ânegative predictionâ.
For mind reading
Example: My lover doesnât love me anymore because she didnât smile at me today.
Problem: This type of thinking involves the assumption of another personâs thinking, action, or behavior, and treating that assumption as a proven fact and basing oneâs thinking, decision, action and behavior on the assumed fact.
Solution: The consideration of alternatives, other concrete and realistic facts besides the sensory perceptions or emotional displays of a person would assist in a better evaluation of someoneâs thinking, action, or behavior.
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For negative prediction
Example: A woman while making love passionately to her husband thinks, my husband is going to leave me.
Problem: This type of thinking involves prediction of conclusions, outcomes or results with no provision for tentativeness. The prediction is considered an absolute certainty.
Solution:  Persons with this cognitive distortion should be assisted to include tentative predictions rather than absolute predictive conclusions. As long as something is predictive, there canât be absolute certainty of outcome.
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4. Catastrophizing
Example: I donât know how to dance. My boyfriend is going to dump me.
Problem: This type of thinking paints the worst scenario from the most trivial events, matters, actions or behaviors. It can turn a quarrel into a war.
Solution: Persons with these cognitive distortions should be taught to consider the details of their worries within the context of the issue at hand. If it is a quarrel, then it is not a war.
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5. Overgeneralization
Example: Since I am a bad at grilling fish, all my other dishes in are going to be a fiasco.
Problem: This type of cognitive distortions uses past actions, behaviors or events, to predict similar future actions, behavior or events without collaborative evidence.
Solutions: Persons with these cognitive distortions should be taught to learn from the past actions, behaviors or events, to improve the future actions, behaviors or events, and not expect the future to repeat the past.
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6. Labeling and mislabeling
Example: I am a bitch because during my drunkenness, I made a pass at my best friendâs boyfriend.
Problem: This type of cognitive distortions that labels oneself or others rather than the inappropriate actions, behaviors or events. It mixes the actions with the person. The drunkard behavior may be bitchy but that doesnât make the woman a bitch.
Solution: Persons with these cognitive distortions should be taught to label the inappropriate actions, behaviors or events, and not the persons.
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7. Magnification or minimization
Example: I didnât kiss my husband today; my love life is going to shit. My husband held me tightly and whispered his passionate love for me, but I feel that it is not as romantic as when it happened on our first date.
Problem: This type of cognitive distortions views the positive actions, behaviors or events as trivial, while viewing the negative as catastrophic.
Solutions: Persons with these cognitive distortions should be taught to view actions, behaviors or events in their perspective, without changing filters to suit their emotions.
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8. Personalization
Example: It rains whenever my boyfriend asks me for a date. I am always the cause of delays in any of our trips
Problem: This type of cognitive distortions personalizes an external negative actions, behaviors or events to oneself without a reason.
Solutions: Persons with these cognitive distortions should be taught to accept what are truly their responsibilities and reject what are not their responsibilities.
Too frequent display any of the above cognitive distortions is an indicator of psychological distress that may lead to disorders (Sharf, 2000). Thus, it is wise to examine our pattern of thinking for cognitive distortions, especially during bouts of depression. So how can a person avoid these pitfalls between negative self-attribution, cognitive distortions and depression? One suggestion is the practice of positive self-attribution as outlined below.
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Positive Self-Attribution
         In practicing positive self-attribution for the avoidance of long term and chronic depressions are as follows:
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Why deliberately and conscientiously? The reason is because sometimes cognitive distortions are so automatic, that one is unaware of its happening. Always (if needing to attribute) attribute the positive behaviors or events (self or others) internally (to self). It leads to positive emotions (Working Resources, 1996-2009). Why, it is stated as âif needing to attributeâ, the reason being sometimes, self attribution is not needed at all. For an example, when someone else does well or is successful, the credit should go to that person.
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Always avoid attributing negative events or behaviors (self or others) internally (to self), or never consider the cause(s) of the negative events or behaviors as unalterable (stability), or as inevitable (uncontrollable), – instead always look for options, alternatives, possible solutions or answers. What if an authority or an expert (i.e., a judge in a legal context) pronounces that you (internal) are responsible for a negative event or behavior? When negative events or behaviors (self or others) have been seemingly proven and attributed by an authority or an expert; then the following would be the suggestion.
4.     When a person have been attributed with a negative event or behavior (self or others), which has been proven, and when a justified penalty (as in legal cases) has been imposed, that penalty can then be accepted as a form of correction, atonement, compensation, or as an opportunity to make things right. Acceptance of a just penalty rather avoidance through an erroneous attribution, would lessen any depression felt by a person affected by the penalty. The reason being, this form of acceptance of a just penalty is psychologically a forgiveness of oneself or self-forgiveness (Wohl & Thompson, 2006).
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Conclusion
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Avoid Negative Self-Attribution, Monitor for Cognitive Distortions
Practice Positive Self-Attributions
For a Physical and Psychological Wellbeing
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 REFERENCES
Abramson, L.Y., Alloy, I.B. & Metalsky, J.I. (1995). Hopelessness depression. In J.N. Buchanan & M.E.P. Seligman (Eds.), Explanatory style (pp. 113-134). Hillsdale, NJ: Erbaum.
Beck, A. T. (1967). Depression: Clinical, Experimental, and theoretical aspects. New York: Hoeber.
Evans, R., & Tait, L.H. (1991). Applying Psychology in Todayâs World: Strategies for Personal Growth, Prentice Hall: Englewood Cliffs, NJ 07632.
Heider, F. (1958). The psychology of interpersonal relations. New York: Wiley.Jones, E. F., & Davies, K. (1965). From acts to dispositions: The attribution process in person perceptions. In L. Berkowitz (Ed.) Advances in experimental Social Psychology, (Vol. 2). New York: Academic Press.
Kelley, H.H. (1967). The warm-cold dimensions in first impressions of persons. Journal of Personality, 18, 431-439.
Riso, L. P., du Toit, P.L., Blandino, J.A., Penna, S., Dacey, S., Duin, J. S., Pacoe, E.M., Grant, M.M.., & Ulmer, C.S. (2003). Cognitive aspects of chronic depression. Journal of abnormal Psychology, 112(1), 72-80.
Sharf, R. S. (2000). Theories of Psychotherapy & Counseling: Concepts and Cases, (2nd Ed.). Wadsworth. Brooks/Cole Counseling: Belmont, CA 94002-3098, United States.
Weiten, W., & Lloyd, M. A. (2006). Psychology Applied to Modern Life: Adjustment in the 21st Century, Thomson Wadsworth: Canada.
Wohl, M. J. A., & Thompson, A. (2006). Hindering the process of behavioural change: The relationship between self-forgiveness and smoking cessation. Unpublished manuscript, Carleton University.
Working Resources (1996-2009). The Art of Positive Emotions: What Is Your Attribution Style? Retrieved October 22, 2009, from Working Resources website: http://dwp.bigplanet.com/workingresources/professionaleffectivenessarticles/article.nhtml?uid=10005
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Two Cote sponsored bills approved
SANTA FE A bill that would create a Military Children Education Compact state commission and anothert that allows for driver’s licenses to be renewed by phone or by electronic means, both sponsored by Rep. Nathan Cote, D-Las Cruces, have been signed by Gov. Bill Richardson.
Read more on Alamogordo Daily News
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My awesome waiter brought this to me for free when I was celebrating at Chili’s. He called it a Blowjob Shot and said I had to drink it to initiate myself into being 21. This is my first shot! Blowjob Shot: Baileys, Kahlua, Whipped Cream. You are not allowed to touch the glass until it’s finished…he got onto to me cuz I tried to! Comments are welcome! This is my first video! Hee hee hee…
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So basically my mother’s God daughter turns 21 later in the year. We are wanting to do something really special for her as she was not expected to live past a year old. SO this will be a HUGE event. We want to make a video with clips and pictures of her childhood and also have a big banner with a photo on it for people to sign. What other great suggestions do people have for something really special and memorable? I will be saying a speech as well as signing it !! So I have to learn that. Please, no stupid replies. (with the video, although she won’t be able to hear the music everyone else will, so even some good song suggestions would be helpful.)
Thanks
thanks for everyone’s suggestions so far. We will be having a big party. She loves music and she loves dancing. So there will be alot of that. I just needed some more specific party ideas to make her feel special and to show her how much we love her and to make the night the best of her young life.
Image taken on 2008-03-16 11:32:26 by UltraCore.
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www.jacquesphillips.com for thefull experience of one awesome 21st birthday that will take you through Germany, Austria and the Czech Republic. — Want to know what to do for your 21st? I get to go through Germany, Austria and beyond for a 10 day adventure with the Thirsty Swagman Euro Hard ‘n’ Fast tour. I’m on a plane to Singapore and starting the celebrations — Whie you’re waiting for the next update, you can check out some of the vids I’ve made from some of the previous Thirsty Adventures at http This time around I wanted to be there myself, camera in one hand beer in the other!
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